


sometimes i look in the mirror & be like, "why you?"

by epimetheuz



Series: came out lookin' to party [1]
Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Angst, Exploring Characters, Gen, M/M, for someone who wants Kent happy I sure don't write like it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-27
Updated: 2016-06-27
Packaged: 2018-07-18 12:07:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7314613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/epimetheuz/pseuds/epimetheuz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I thought you hated me,” Kent says, and his voice breaks on the last part of his sentence. Kent doesn’t stop looking up at Jack, doesn’t say anything else. Jack lets go of his shirt, mechanically stiff, and backs out of the bathroom, back into the party the two of them were supposed to be attending. Jack doesn’t stop looking at the space around Kent- the paneling of the wall behind him, the space between Kent’s hands, the flicker of the light against the skin of Kent’s neck.<br/>Kent Parson is still staring straight at Jack.</p>
<p>                    (alternatively: Jack Zimmermann does not like Kent.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	sometimes i look in the mirror & be like, "why you?"

**Author's Note:**

> title from nicki minaj's "win again", because for some reason, that song screams parse to me.  
>  **disclaimer:** i actually adore kent parson, but this fic doesn't treat him all that great. it's a one-shot set in a currently severely under-developed series based on my own interpretation of kent. there's a lot more to this, but i haven't written that up yet. basically- this is just kind of exploring my take on jack  & kent's dynamic. there'll be more of it to come later, i promise!!  
> a SUPER big shoutout to frankie [androidboy](http://androidboy.tumblr.com) for giving this a read over and kind of walking me through some characterization issues. they're the greatest.

Jack Zimmermann is sixteen years old when he meets Kent Parson. Kent Parson is only fifteen. It takes Jack twenty minutes- twenty long minutes, filled with watching Kent Parson fall over himself on the ice and make a general ruckus and make their coach literally snort with laughter- to realize that he hates Kent Parson. Kent, however, slides up next to him, pats Jack on the back and sticks his hand out- “I’m Kenny.”

“Everyone’s been callin’ you Parse all day, asshole,” shouts their right-winger, Jamie. Kent rolls his eyes and nudges Jack- like they’re friends, like this is _fun_.

“Zimmy’s different, Jay, don’t be jelly,” Parson (not Kenny) shouts back before turning back to Jack. His hand is still outstretched, and Kent’s wearing a huge smile- it looks as sincere as possible, but. Well. Jack Zimmermann’s mother is the award-winning Broadway actress Alicia Zimmermann- in other words, Jack is not an idiot.

“It’s just Jack. Parse.” Jack’s pause in between his words is deliberate, and he ignores Kent’s hand as he shoves his way onto the ice.

**____**

Jack Zimmermann is eighteen years old the first time he kisses Kent Parson. It’s quick and dirty and he bites Kent’s bottom lip as he pulls back and- well, all Kent does is stare up at Jack, eyes wide and bright and, fuck. Kent looks like he’s going to cry and Jack’s only just begun to worry about it when Kent actually does let a few tears slip down his face. Kent’s quick to rub them away, pushing the back of his left hand against his check as he clears his throat, and Jack just stands there, hunched over Kent, with his hand fisted in the other’s jersey.

“I thought you hated me,” Kent says, and his voice breaks on the last part of his sentence. Kent doesn’t stop looking up at Jack, doesn’t say anything else. Jack lets go of his shirt, mechanically stiff, and backs out of the bathroom, back into the party the two of them were supposed to be attending. Jack doesn’t stop looking at the space around Kent- the paneling of the wall behind him, the space between Kent’s hands, the flicker of the light against the skin of Kent’s neck.

Kent Parson is still staring straight at Jack.

**____**

Kent Parson is eighteen years old when his name gets called first, when his father bursts into tears and his sisters, both only seven, fall out of their seats in excitement. Jack’s father stands up with Alicia as Kent walks on stage and every time Jack’s father brings his hands together, Jack falls a little bit more apart. He doesn’t look away, though.

Kent stands upright as he shrugs on the Ace’s jersey and Kent doesn’t smile- he looks pale, paler than Jack, even, and his forehead is shiny with sweat. Kent turns when he’s told to and grimaces at a camera- and Jack knows what’s going on here, knows that that grimace is supposed to be a smile. Jack knows and Jack thinks about Kent and how Kent Parson knows that he’s hated by Jack Zimmermann.

Jack turns away from Kent, then, and picks up his glass of water.

**____**

 

That night, Jack Zimmermann is on his knees in front of Kent, his hand on Kent’s cock, when Kent shifts. Jack pauses, because he’d been about to wrap his lips around Kent’s dick, like planned, and when Kent doesn’t stop shifting, Jack just sighs, pulls his hand back, and sits up. Jack’s staring up at Kent and Kent’s staring right back, his eyes as wide and bright as ever. Jack doesn’t say anything.

“Is it because I’m gay?” Kent asks and Jack blinks once, twice, three times before tilting his head slightly. He’s lost- and Kent just stares down at him.

“You hate me- _why_? Because I’m gay? Because I’m better? Because you’re closeted? Why?” Kent repeats, frustrated. Jack rocks back onto his heels, looking down at Kent’s softening cock. He sits on his heels for about thirty seconds, going over his options- he’s naked, and his clothes are somewhere in his bathroom; his parents are right down the hall from him and Kent’s parent is on the floor under theirs. Jack takes a deep breath.

“I don’t hate you, Kenny,” Jack says, only- the pause before Kent’s name is there and it’s obvious, like a spot of white paint on black paper. The lie is starch against the quiet of the room and Kent doesn’t react in any obvious way for what feels like an hour- and then Kent’s breaking the tense silence between the two of them to get up. Kent pulls up his sweatpants as he goes, neatly stepping over Jack’s arm, to dart out of Jack’s room.

It doesn’t occur to Jack to chase after Kent. (Jack’s never called Kent ‘Kenny’ before in his life.)

**____**

Kent’s twenty-four when Jack sees him next to Lardo, clutching his stomach as he laughs. Jack doesn’t do much, other than startle, just a little bit. Kent Parson belongs to the jealous, twisted Jack Zimmermann of Juniors. The current, brand-new Jack Zimmermann just watches as Kent moves to tug his snapback around, Ransom’s arm making it’s way around Kent’s shoulder. Jack doesn’t watch long, turning back to Eric. (It’s been seven years since he’s seen Kent.)

Eric’s looking up at Jack, brown eyes warm and just a little bit unknowable. It’s not a homecoming, what Jack sees in Eric, but it’s a new beginning- and after the life Jack’s lived, the places he’s called home, well- Jack’s ready for something new.

The night continues like that, Kent popping up on the edges of Jack’s peripheral vision and it always startles Jack- just for a second. Jack continually turns back to Eric and Eric gives him that sweet and slow smile that seems to be saved just for Jack but- Kent’s still in the Haus, and when Jack throws a quick glance over his shoulder, Kent’s got his arm around Camila’s waist. Camila’s leaning into Kent and they’re both smiling like they’re the only people in the room. Jack excuses himself, cutting Eric off midsentence, and he’ll feel bad about that later, because right now he’s stuck on the way Kent had smiled at Jack, asked Jack if he’d missed Kent, and then faded away into the crowd like Jack was the intruder here.

Camila looks up when Jack gets near and her smile grows even bigger. She nudges Kent and he doesn’t look up, muttering something to Camila. Jack waits. Kent moves his arm, makes his way towards Jack, and Jack leads him upstairs.

**____**

Kent leaves and Jack curls up on his floor and he can see, clear as day, Kent driving away and crying. It takes Jack ten minutes to calm down enough to find his phone.

**didnt ever hate u**

Kent doesn’t text him back. It’s nothing that Jack isn’t used to.


End file.
